Ah yes, nothing says Labour Day quite like Brave shirts, party slogans, and a full-on PLP pep rally disguised as a tribute to the Bahamian worker. Enter Fred “Numbers Game” Mitchell, the ever-vocal Chairman of the New Day PLP, who has once again climbed the golden soapbox to deliver a message so rich in political delusion, it should come with a warning label: “May cause nausea in rational individuals.”

Apparently, according to Chairman Fred, the Free National Movement was “so shamed” by the PLP’s sheer volume of Brave-shirted disciples that they didn’t dare show up in party colours. Not because the unions themselves requested a nonpartisan show of solidarity. Not because Labour Day is supposed to honor workers. No, no. It’s because, in Fred’s world, everything is a numbers game, and the FNM just couldn’t stomach the PLP’s… math.

He’s even quoted saying it’s time to separate the “sheep from the goats, the wheat from the chaff.” One has to ask: is he describing voters or preparing for a backyard biblical cosplay? Either way, it’s clear—Fred wants every branch to become an electoral sorting facility. Skip the policies, forget the governance. Just count the sheep (and make sure they vote PLP).

Now, let’s talk about those shirts. No tribute to Sir Randol Fawkes. No mention of the actual LABOURERS being honored. Just a sea of “Brave” as if Sir Randol moonlighted as a party promoter for the PLP. Never mind that the unions asked for no political colours—a humble request promptly ignored because, of course, the PLP knows better than THE PEOPLE… and THE UNIONS… and common sense.

One can’t help but admire the PLP’s consistency. They’ve politicized everything from pot holes to power outages, and now, they’ve turned a national day of workers’ solidarity into a mini-convention. All that was missing was a conch fritter stand and a DJ shouting “PLP to the world!”

But don’t worry, Fred isn’t done. He ended his statement with a public service announcement to beware of AI-generated misinformation on social media. Ironically, he made this warning immediately after spewing misinformation of his own. The self-awareness is about as present as competent governance in this administration.

At the end of the day, while the rest of the nation marches in unity with Bahamian workers, Fred and crew are marching to the beat of their own delusion—yellow flags waving, egos inflating, and logic… well, that’s still stuck in the wet paper bag the PLP can’t seem to govern their way out of.

So, let the PLP continue to celebrate their “historic turnout” at a march they hijacked. The rest of us will be over here, busy working—for real—and preparing to rescue this country from the political circus currently in charge.

END